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Jacky Ha-Ha
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James Bond and Jason Bourne have just been topped! A battle for the world is set into unstoppable motion and Hays Baker is the only one who can save it.

Hays Baker and his wife Lizbeth possess super-human strength, extraordinary intelligence, stunning looks, a sex life to die for, and two beautiful children. Of course they do—they're Elites, endowed at birth with the very best that the world can offer. The only problem in their perfect world: humans and their toys!

The one with the most toys—dies
The top operative for the Agency of Change, Hays has just won the fiercest battle of his career. He has been praised by the President, and is a national hero. But before he can savor his triumph, he receives an unbelievable shock that overturns everything he thought was true. Suddenly Hays is on the other side of the gun, forced to leave his perfect family and fight for his life.

Now a hunted fugitive, Hays is thrown into a life he never dreamed possible—fighting to save humans everywhere from extinction. He enlists all of his training to uncover the truth that will save millions of lives—maybe even his own. James Patterson's Toys is a thriller on a hyper plane—with a hero who rivals both James Bond and Jason Bourne.


Chapter 6

I FOUND MYSELF staring at the menu screen, a little miffed at the next message."Presented by Toyz Corporation," it blinked in stark black and white. "We hope you'll come back soon."

"Great," I sighed. "Well, it did say great moments in cinema, didn't it?"

Lizbeth was watching me with folded arms and raised eyebrows as I removed the mood helmet.

"Have a good time?" she asked and started to grin mischievously.

"A little short-lived," I said, wondering if any of the other programs were full-length—maybe next time I'd get into something like a Viking raid, or maybe visit that Moorish harem.

Actually, I was quite a student of human history. I never would have turned the government back over to them, but if one thing's true about the Homo sapiens, it's that they almost never let you down in the drama department. I mean the scandals, the three World Wars, the artistic movements, games, literature, film...and the music! I adored Mozart, but also Bob Dylan and Edith Piaf.s

I took Lizbeth's hand and we strolled back toward the center of the great hall.

"Let's take a look at those dolls. I want to see if they're suitable for April and Chloe," she said. "They're absolutely begging for them, Hays."

"They have more than enough toys already," I said, but quickly relented. "Oh all right, Jinx. I can't say no to them."

Lizbeth pointed at a demonstration of the season's hottest new items—Jessica and Jacob dolls, beautiful miniature androids that looked and acted perfectly lifelike. Kids everywhere—including our own two daughters—were causing parents to line up around the block to purchase them at Toyz stores all over the country.

The clever display was set up in a series of tableaux—separate scenes of home, office, store, and restaurant—with dozens of the lifelike dolls chatting, working, and eating just like real people, though only sixteen inches tall.

To be perfectly honest, while I couldn't quite take my eyes off them, I found the dolls more than a little creepy.

But the crowd was riveted, especially a growing knot in front of a sign that read THESE MODELS SPECIAL ORDER ONLY.

When Lizbeth and I strolled over there, we immediately saw why.

"Oh my," she said. "Oh dear, Hays. That's just gross."

Underneath the sign was a doll-sized bed where a Jake and Jessie in the buff were thrashing around in primal delight. I mean, those two were really going at it.

"I guess we can scratch the special orders off our list," Lizbeth said.

"They really can do everything. Energetic little devil, isn't he?"

Lizbeth rolled her eyes."There's more to it than slamming in and out like a piston. Don't you think, Hays? I'll bet you anything these dolls were programmed by a man—and probably one between the ages of sixteen and thirty-five. They should let a woman redo the code if they really want them to sell."

"Thinking about volunteering?" I said. Biocircuitry was Lizbeth's specialty—she was one of the foremost experts at the Agency of Change. "And what would you do differently, dear heart? Have all the Jacobs look like me?"

Her lips brushed my ear."That's not such a terrible idea, Hays. Say, I'm thinking this party has served its official purpose for us," she murmured. "What do you say we go home? Maybe play some games of our own?"

"Umm, coming through," I said, taking her hand and leading her off the crowded floor. The best night of our professional lives was about to get even better, and on a much more intimate level.

Jinxie and I were going home.


Copyright © 2011 by James Patterson

Read by Matthew Bomer

Mathew Bomer currently stars Neal Caffrey on USA's White Collar. Bomer received a BFA Degree from Carnegie Mellon University and his feature film credits include The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning and Flight Plan. Raised in Spring, Texas, Bomer is also a writer and currently lives in Los Angeles.

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